Vinny Talks Keto Tips During College And Becoming A Stripper

Vinny Talks Keto Tips During College And Becoming A Stripper

October 30, 2019 1 By William Morgan


– Welcome back to Off Campus.
We have a very special guest with us.
We’re freaking out
because he’s our favorite
keto guido, Mr. Vinny G.
– What up, you’re not
freaking out, don’t lie.
– Abby started keto this week.
– Yeah, to prepare and
to like, turn you on.
My day consists of grilled chicken
breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
– But you’re doing it
all completely wrong.
– Yeah, no I–
– Oh, she’s doing it wrong.
I love to hear that.
– So what can I eat later?
I’m starving.
– Well, I’m free.
(gasps and laughs)
– Okay, stupid, right?
– Do you like, you like chicken?
– Yeah.
– So, you can get, like–
– I don’t like cooking it myself, though.
Something about it turns–
– It turns you off.
– It’s gross, yeah.
– Yeah.
– Do you think you could
be keto in college?
– Yes, 100%.
– [Taylor] Would you?
– I could be keto anywhere.
Well, now I would.
I didn’t back then.
– [Taylor] Yeah.
– ‘Cause I didn’t know.
– He said I’m invincible.
– Where’d you go to college?
– So I did one semester at–
– [Abby] Love this.
(laughs)
– I mean, I graduated.
– [Taylor] It counts.
– I graduated college.
– (both women) Oh, okay.
– [Vinny] Yeah, yeah, yeah,
I have a 3.9 GPA.
– Oh, he’s throwing out the–.
– So he’s a genius.
– GPAs.
– Political science degree.
– Keto makes me shit my brains out.
Is that normal? Or is it…
– Really?
First of all, you haven’t been keto.
Let’s just establish that.
Whatever you’re doing–
– I can’t wait to tell the office that
’cause she’s been bragging about it.
– Whatever, yeah, like me,
I promote like low-carb,
being healthy, grain-free, sugar-free,
whatever, blah blah blah.
But you’re like way not
even anywhere near there.
– Yeah, no, great, okay good to know.
– So she’s doing it all wrong, but–
– And that makes you shit your brains out,
whatever you’re doing.
– There you go, whatever she’s doing.
What are we drinking if we’re keto?
What should we stay away from?
– Yeah.
You can do a vodka soda.
– Okay.
– Okay, you can do a tequila on the rocks.
You can do shots.
– (both) Oh.
– Shots…
– [Vinny] Yeah.
– So you’re getting us drunk now.
Did you have to be drunk
for the Chippendales show?
– I was never drunk once for Chippendales.
– Ew, I love that, I do.
– [Taylor] Did–
– Did you say, “ew”?
– [Taylor] Yeah, she said–
– Or “ooh, I love it”?
– No, ew, I love it.
– She always says ew, it’s a compliment.
– Is that, like, a thing?
– Last week we went through
all the different types of
fuckboys you run into at college
and we decided that you
are a nice guy fuckboy.
– Which is the worst kind.
– Yes! Yes.
– [Abby] Because you
don’t know you’re nice.
– It’s a fuckboy.
‘Cause I’m like, he’s so
nice, he could never hurt me
and then I’m crying on the floor.
– But I’ve always
developed this perception,
somehow, that I was like
a saint or something.
– Yeah, I get that vibe, too.
– Like there’s the cutest
mama’s boy, blah blah blah,
like maybe ’cause it was
relative to them in the house.
And, like, I did seem like that.
– Yeah.
– So I mean, I hate to break the news,
it’s not like it’s like
a headline tomorrow,
but like, I was bringing
home girls as well.
– (both women) Yeah.
– You know, I was doing one night stands.
– [Taylor] Yeah.
– You know, I wasn’t
like, I wasn’t perfect
when it came to women.
– Why do you ghost instead of
just saying you’re not into it
or that it’s over?
– I don’t ghost.
‘Cause I’m the nice guy fuckboy.
And guys do that because it’s just,
it’s easy, they just don’t give a fuck.
They’re just like–
– Yeah.
– It sucks, though.
– [Abby] Sometimes–
– You know?
On the other–
– Yeah.
– Obviously I’ve been ghosted.
– Why are you crying?
No, I’m kidding.
(laughter)
– Wipe the tears from your eyes, bitch.
She’s been ghosted.
– I was ghosted once.
– (gasp) By who? Out her.
– Nah, it was actually
this girl was like a model,
a Playboy model or something.
– Oh, so we have no chance.
– So it was me.
– [Vinny] Back in the day.
(laughter)
– Can fuckboys ever
become boyfriend material
or is that a myth?
Everybody, every fuckboy.
– Well, what but, but,
what are you referring to, like cheating?
– Just, like–
– ‘Cause a guy that’s cheating
isn’t ready to be in a relationship.
– Ooh, he said it.
– I agree, yeah.
– But we can clarify
that and you’re the one,
then everything else is gravy, baby.
You know, yeah, thank you.
– [Abby] Gravy baby.
– What would make you
stop being a fuckboy?
– ‘Cause I was not a fuckboy in college.
– Yeah.
– Yeah, you were depressed at SUNY.
– I was the depressed SUNY miserable kid
that just lost his virginity.
I want, like, the baddest chick.
– Yeah.
– Oop.
– Oop.
– [Vinny] I want, and that–
– We’re right here.
– Well no, like, you do.
You guys do something cool,
like you actually have a trade,
like you make memes,
no (laughs).
– Thanks (gasps).
– Like, I’m tired of like,
just being the one that like does shit.
– (both women) Yeah.
– I want, like, her to do shit.
– Someone else that does shit.
– (all) Yeah.