COOKING MY CAT A GOURMET MEAL | AYYDUBS

COOKING MY CAT A GOURMET MEAL | AYYDUBS

November 3, 2019 35 By William Morgan


– Hi, guys. How’s it hanging? Today is a very exciting day. Not for me, not for you,
not really for anyone, except for Moo. Today, I am making my cat her very first, gourmet, home-made meal. (gasping) Thus far, she’s just eaten
a bunch a kitty crap. I gotta be honest. Just packaged food, kibble. She’s never tasted sweet,
sweet homemade cooking, except for when she steals my food, which, she does, kinda frequently. So, I made moo this menu, and as you can see,
everything on the menu, is $0. Here is the menu for this evening. Let me know what you’re
interested in having. Just put your paw on whatever you’d like. We’ve got the mackerel, the trout, chicken, chicken and
tuna, deluxe fish balls, tuna patties, cat salad,
and then chef’s pick. I’m the chef. Is this poop on your leg? There’s definitely some poo on your leg. Oh, my God, that’s disgusting. Moo, you haven’t even chosen
what you want to eat yet. Which one of these? (gasping) Oo, chef’s pick. Good choice. Moo has chosen chef’s pick, and I am the chef. I am going to make deluxe fish balls. How does that sound, baby. Deluxe fishy balls. It’s cool, it’s still gonna
be a surprise for her, ’cause she doesn’t speak English. (hip hop music) Boom, let’s go. (hip hop music) Tuna. (hip hop music) Great. (hip hop music) Our first order of business
is to preheat the oven. You really shouldn’t be
up here, do you know that? (static) First and foremost, I’m
going to beat an egg. Let’s get beatin’. This is actually a special skill of mine. Boom. Bam. Yap, slam dunk. (whisking) (groaning) Next, we are going to place this can of tuna fish in here. Damn, I gotta be honest, can opening is a difficult task for me. It’s because I’m left-handed, so it always just feels like a little off. There we go. Ew, it smells so fishy. (retching) (snapping) Next, we’re gonna need two
tablespoons of breadcrumbs. She’s watching. Un, dos. And then, get outta here,
that’s not for you yet. And then, we need three tablespoons of grated cheese. You see this, she’s just
stepping on the pan, like it’s no big deal. Do you have anything you want
to say to them, baby Moo? Other than that you have poop on your leg? Now, we are going to mix this together until it is in a paste-like form. Ew. I think that’s pretty good. That looks good to me. (foil crinkling) (spraying) Ew. Moo, do see how much I love you? Yeah. Moo, moo, hey, get out, get outta here. You’re really stressing me, Moo, moo, that’s raw egg. When I count to three, if
you are not done eating that raw food, I’m going to eat you. Let’s bake these bitches. 20 minutes. I got Moo a bib with a cat on it, that looks nothing like Moo, which, I guess, is kinda weird. This might be problematic
in the cat community, but I’m gonna hope it flies. Come here, baby. Awe, there we go. Look at that, you look good. You look good. She’s very weird. Is this really a comfortable
spot for you to hang out in? Where you could fall to
your death at any moment? What are you doin’? Yum. (dinging) When I was looking at
the other cat recipes, I saw that one of them recommended that you sprinkle a little
bit of catnip on top at the end. This is not included in this recipe, but it makes me laugh, so let’s drug my cat. (up beat music) Yum, yum, yum, yummy, yum. Drugs, drugs, drugs. We love drugs. She’s so excited. Look at her waggin’ her tail. Come here, baby. Yummy. (funk music) Oh, eat it on the plate, all right? You want me to feed it to you? (funk music) Yummy. She likes it. She likes it a lot. Oh, nevermind. (funk music) Oop, and it’s on the floor. Do you prefer eating food off the floor like an animal? You gonna eat that? (funk music) This is very aggravating as a chef to have to follow your
food on to the floor to see if it gets consumed. (funk music) Ah, so cute. (laughing) It’s not a toy. Oh, there’s the bib. Eat it, eat it. Why won’t you eat it? (funk music) Eat it. (funk music) This is so disrespectful. I can’t believe the disrespect. Are you just gonna lay next to it? What the hell? (static) All right. Let’s see if we put it in her food bowl, if that makes a difference. Sorry, it’s a little messy in here. (funk music) (crying) All right, well. This has been extraordinarily
disappointing. (sad music)